So another year another life....seems like a lifetime has come and gone this year. I have gained relatives(love you Carolyn and Kaiden) found old friends...Chris, Jason, Wade, Jeff and Bernie...Melissa, Kasey and Aaron. Made new friends, BleachBangs, Shome, Alexia and many more. I loved, I lost....but most importantly, i found myself. This new year proves to be the best yet. I just hope i am right! to friends old and new....i love you!

musings, Rantings, and such

So i finally have this wonderfully great guy in my life, who i believe i am starting to love. He is everything i have been waiting for. The problem is, yes there is always a problem, his current almost ex wife is on the verge of starting problems for us. She is the one who wanted the divorce, she is the one who wanted out...so bitch fucking go already! I should have predicted this, as Matt and i were just talking about it at dinner the other night. It should not be this way, i shouldn't feel like i am sneaking around. we should be able to move on with our life together, not worry about what she is going to do next. Matt and i are going to make it, I am not going to let some little bitch change that. we are secure in us, she has no barring on us what so ever. I made a promise to him that i am here for him, i am not leaving i am here for the long haul. So i am not going to let some crazy baby momma run me off.

wow, heres the scoop

So i have been in ST. Joe since jan. still no job. So i am contemplating a huge move if i can find a job and a house! With the constant urging of my cousin! so we shall see...it would be nice to be in a place where it doesnt rain often, no winter and no allergies....hmmm

new life, new year, new me

this year I have decided to purge myself of all things negative in my life....people, places everything. if you make it to the new life the new round then you deserve the love I bestow. we are moving friday to st joseph, mo...we will be staying with my best friend angie for 2 weeks then I close on my house. a house I am buying without a man...im doing it all on my own. I will be looking for a job. probably go back to bartending just to get me in my house and paying bills. everyone have a great year. more when we are settled.

wow what the hell am I doing

so hmmm I kissed a boy and I liked it. but I shouldn't. I am in the worst position ever. he's funny smart hot great in bed...but should so be off limits. he's the first guy that's not mike since valentines day 2006. that's almost 3 yrs. if I was smart I'd run the other way....but I'm not.

yay!

So, I went with my best friend Wayne to see Janet Jackson! OMFG, she was awesome! I am so thankful for my friend Kasey for making me live again. Since Mike leaving this time my self-worth plummeted. She made me get out a week ago, and it reminded me i have friends who care about me. Then Wayne out of the blue called with these tickets, and i went to that. then we met kasey out at sharks and i ran into some friends that i thought i had lost in the final break off. turns out hes being a total douche. I am a little sad too, i was supposed to go see Nigel next weekend but the venue had some issues and closed....no point in going. oh well obviously i wasnt meant to go yet!

Cougars....meow!

So about 3 years ago i met a really sweet kid on myspace...he was 16 at the time so i tried to fix him up with my step daughter. then we stopped talking for quite a while. His dad is a bonafide rockstar, and he is becoming one in is own right. I saw him in august, which made me try to email him....now we are talking again, he's 19 and wants me to come see his next show. i am all set to do it. but i havent heard from him in a few days. hes had several shows so i am letting it slide until friday.